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A/N Disclaimer: Sequel to Strength of Will: The Calm Before the Storm following and alternate story line. Thanks to Dee for all her help with this entire project. She's a lifesaver. "Gambling?" Jimmy let go of Lou's waist and side stepped her to get around her. She didn't immediately react as he stepped forward until he was toe to toe with Alex. "You got a lot of nerve." The bunkhouse door opened and Kid ran out into the yard, with a worried Rachel not far behind him. He was all set to ride out but now made his way to the crowd and the dead man on the ground. "I'm just stating the facts, Jimmy." Alex didn't back down. "Simmons isn't done. Not by a long shot. You think he sent one man to do his dirty work?" He paused for a brief second. "He isn't far behind him. I told ya'll up front he would come for her. 'He' as in, in person. Simmons likes to get his own hands dirty. He sent this guy as a warning and he damn near walked out of the station with her after that 'drop your guns' bit." "He wasn't leaving this station with her." Jimmy rolled up his sleeves. "Everyone who dropped their guns knew that." "Jimmy." Lou's voice broke into the building tension. "Jimmy, don't." It was too late; Jimmy was already moving. He landed a punch right across Alex's left eye with a right cross. Alex lost his footing but caught himself in a crouch right in front of Jimmy. He lifted his head to look up at the man angrily. "Alex, don't." Lou jumped in between the two of them and put her hands on Jimmy's chest to push him back away from Alex who was straightening himself back up. "I didn't gamble with Lou's life," Jimmy spat at him. "I was saving it. That man was resolved to kill himself and anyone else he had to, but I don't have to explain myself to you." "You got lucky." Alex stood back up and winced blinking with his wounded eye. He wasn't ready to let it drop. "Luck, Jimmy that's all it was. It could be the both of them laying here." "What happened?" Kid broke in as Alex pushed Lou out of the way and hit Jimmy back. Kid caught Lou, who was now crying, as Jimmy hit the ground and then shoved himself back up and jumped on top of Alex. "Whoa." Buck would have stopped Jimmy but after seeing Alex shove Lou out of the way he thought the two of them needed to have a go at each other. Everyone watched and waited as Jimmy and Alex traded blows until Jimmy got the upper hand and landed one more punch that knocked Alex out cold. Jimmy staggered on his feet and turned back to Kid and Lou, wiping the blood from his busted lip. No one spoke. Lou's head was resting on Kid's chest as she had hidden her view from the fight and she was shuddering from the crying that she was doing. Kid and Jimmy met each other's eyes. Jimmy didn't go any closer to the two of them. He stood still trying to catch his breath and think of what in the world he could say to Lou. He shouldn't have done it. He should have let it go. He shook his head and finally walked towards the water barrel to clean up. He didn't look behind him at his friends gathering around Alex making sure he was alright. Stanton Ridge Drip...drip...drip It was dimly lit in the alley and the smell of mold and various expelled liquids wafted toward the group of men that held their handkerchiefs over their faces to keep from gagging on the stench. The dripping from the roof was unnerving everyone as they walked slowly down the narrow passageway in a single file line feeling closed in on all sides. "Who found her?" A man asked from the dark recess of the alley coughing against the rag over his face from sucking in a mouthful of the foul air. "One of her friends inside." A deputy answered him nearly losing his lunch as he grimaced and covered his mouth and nose tighter. "There were nearly twenty men inside but she says she can identify the man." "How does she remember who did it with that many people here?" Sam Cain looked from the body to his deputy. "They must have been partying all night long." He frowned as he looked back to the young woman at his feet. She was tiny with once long brown hair but now half of it lay strewn all over the alley. Someone had taken the time to cut her hair off with a knife before they had killed her. She looked strangely like... He cocked his head to a different angle still looking at the young woman trying to decide whom she looked like. Suddenly it hit him. She looked like Lou. A female version of Lou, but Lou nonetheless. Her lifeless eyes stared up at him. And he finally had to look away as the gash on her face from brow to chin got the better of him. He turned towards the men that lined the alleyway. The posse had been assembled to help him on the case. Several were deputies from other towns and a few were townsfolk, coming from Lewis, Benton, and Fairmont. All of the places the other women had been found. They had all been found the same with their hair chopped off and the slash on their face. The men responsible were traveling away from Stanton toward St. Jo and Sam didn't know where from there. It was a large group, twenty or more people, and all run by a man named Simmons. "Let's talk to her friend then try to beat these bastards to St. Jo. I don't want any more dead girls on my conscience." "Amen," one of the men answered. The posse headed out of the alley. Joseph Simmons walked into the establishment in St. Jo with half of his men behind him and watched as the women came out of the woodwork to service them. There were hands touching them from the moment that they walked through the door. "I want to talk to your boss," Simmons said with a snarl, pushing the first woman to lay hold of him off. She turned with a scowl and walked away. "Wicks!" she yelled over the chattering of the crowd. Simmons watched as most of the men with him tonight filed up the stairs with a woman on their arm. They needed the break; they had been traveling hard. He leaned back against the wall as he waited for this Wicks person and unfolded a piece of paper with Lou's picture on it. One of the men in the camp had drawn it for him. Davis had a knack with art and had captured her perfectly. He looked over the face of the sleeping woman in the picture and felt a sort of ache where his heart should have been. She was the one woman who he would have no matter what it cost him. She had become his obsession. "Well now," a man said as he walked out of the back and stopped just short of Simmons, sizing him up. "I'm the boss here. What can I do for you?" "I want a woman." Simmons looked up and met the man's eyes. He never had a problem looking a man in the eye no matter what he had done to him or his family. "Well you've come to the right place." Wicks smiled brightly. "We've got everything a man could want here." "I want a woman who looks as close to this as possible." Simmons handed Wick's the drawing. Wicks took the picture and looked it over thoughtfully. He paused seeming somewhat thrown off by it. Simmons pushed himself off the wall as he watched the man's reaction. Something didn't seem right about the way Wicks had tensed up. "I think I can help you with that," Wicks said quietly still looking over the picture. "Something wrong?" Simmons asked. "No, no...I just thought she looked familiar." Wicks sighed then handed the picture back to Simmons. "I have the perfect woman for you...Allisa!" he called. Jimmy woke with a start. He looked around the bunkhouse wondering when it had gotten dark. When he had lain down it was still afternoon but now it appeared the night had come on and with it he felt the cool breeze drift in through the open window. He sat up and looked over at the other riders sleeping forms. They were all exhausted. After coming from various rides, having the show down with Conner, Jimmy's fight with Alex and then dealing with Teaspoon over everything that had happened, they were all ready to sack out. Cody had barely even wanted supper. "Damn," Jimmy muttered as he thought about Lou. Kid had left right after Alex was taken care of and Lou had retreated to her bedroom. They still hadn't spoken about the fight and he didn't know what she thought about it. He hated for her to see him that mad. Especially after everything she had been through. He didn't know what to tell her. He knew he needed to say something since he was leaving in the morning on a ride. The old Lou knew what she was getting into when she had agreed to see him. The old Lou though wasn't anywhere around. The new Lou was just finding out. Getting to his feet, he looked out the window. Finally, he pulled his clothes on when he realized that he wasn't going back to sleep tonight. He grabbed his coat and walked out the door needing to take a stroll. Maybe, it would clear his head. The darkness swirled around in her brain coalescing into full formed images that swam deep into the recesses of her mind bringing together past and present until it all became one. There was a moment of panic at the onset but Lou settled back into the warmth of her life being restored and opened her eyes. She brought her memory back with her to the waking world in a fit of recollection that left her breathless. She lay on the grass starring up at the night sky panting as she realized that she remembered everything. She had come outside after everyone had fallen asleep and found her way to the tree that Jimmy and she had picnicked under only a month or two ago. She hadn't remembered at the time but now she did. She smiled as a tear of joy fell across her cheek. She was whole, not healed exactly but so close. The wounds of the past were dwarfed by the return of her sweet memories. She covered her mouth to contain the sob of absolute bliss. The bright full moon overhead became the object of focus as the tears came and she let wave after wave of relief fall over her. The tears subsided and she beamed up at the moon stretching out her arms against the cool grass. "Thank You, God," she whispered into the night seeing the fireflies wink their response around her. She heard the crackle of underbrush and found her way back to her surroundings in time to see Jimmy walking up on her obviously oblivious to her presence. He was muttering under his breath and kicking at the dirt. Lou laughed softly, happy that she could remember everything she loved about him. Jimmy stopped hearing the familiar laugh. He searched through the moonlit night and spotted Lou's small form on the ground, sprawled out like an angel. He hurried over wondering what in the world she was doing out here. "Lou, you alright?" "Fine." She smiled up at him, propping herself up on her elbows. Jimmy tried to still the excitement that raced through him from seeing her like that. She looked so happy and beautiful. So beautiful. He wanted to be down there with her wrapped up in her. "Want to sit with me?" she asked patting the ground beside her. Jimmy shook his head nervously. He still didn't know what to say about the fight earlier. The fight, her crying on Kid, it was all so fresh in his mind, eating him up. He walked a little ways away hoping that the space between them would calm the heat that was flushing through his body slowly making it's way into every fold. He made it to the tree and turned back to her. Lou got to her feet behind him. "Lou, I know you don't really remember what I was like," he started. "Jimmy," Lou broke in as she made her way over to him. She stopped when he looked up. "I need to say this." Jimmy caught her eye. She could tell she wasn't going to get a word in until he had finished, so she remained quiet. "I got a lot of flaws, things that I ain't proud of. You have these pieces of us, pieces of wonderful moments that we shared. Pieces without the whole picture." He paused trying to find something to rest his gaze on other than her. "I get so mad sometimes...it's like this blaze burning me up from the inside." Lou stilled her racing heart as he turned and grabbed a hold of the tree behind him his head falling between his outstretched arms. His breathing had become labored as he wrestled with the part of himself that she knew all too well. It was the part of him that she had assured him didn't have to rule him. Lou crossed the distance between them. "You don't know me," he whispered, his eyes closed tight as if he was trying to avoid seeing her at all. "I shouldn't have... I saw the fear in your eyes after I went after Alex." Lou moved between Jimmy and the tree and rose up between his arms, her face resting inches from his. His eyes remained closed but she could tell he felt her there as he breathed in deeply from the proximity and his entire body seemed to tense. She touched his face with her hands and felt him trying to turn away in shame. Lou held him steady though. She forced him to look at her. "Jimmy, I'm not afraid of you," she whispered. He met her eyes again. She could see that he was still struggling, wrestling with demons that had haunted him for what seemed an eternity. "I shouldn't have done that," he breathed. "Probably not." Lou stroked his cheek feeling old desires and present ones uniting. "It doesn't matter now though. Alex is okay. You just wounded his pride." Her hand slipped to his neck. "I know you, Jimmy. I know how much it's tearing you up inside that you gave into that anger but you have more good in you. More good than all your anger. You only feel bad because you know you could have stopped yourself." "Lou?" Jimmy searched her face as realization began to surface. She sounded like the old Lou. Just like her. She smiled and leaned forward kissing him softly as her arms wound around him pulling herself into him. He leaned into the kiss, his arms slipping off the tree to encircle her. She pulled back quietly and rested her head on his shoulder. "I remember," she whispered into his ear. His hold tightened around her. "Everything." Jimmy trembled against her, feeling her lips graze his neck as she pulled back so that he could read the truth written on her face. "God, Lou." He smiled, as she pulled herself up to kiss him again. He kissed her, trying to hold back the full force of his desire still vividly aware that she was mending. He felt her soft fingers wind themselves under his shirt. They trailed slowly over his chest and he deepened the kiss as his resolve wavered. He didn't even realize that buttons had come undone or his coat had slipped to the ground. He stopped pulling back, breathlessly. "We can't, Lou." He was breathing just as heavy as she was, fighting every instinct that they had between them. "You're still healing." Lou leaned back against the tree and began to unbutton the buttons on her dress. "I'm healed enough, Jimmy." She shared his breath and as their lips met once more, his hands replaced hers in the task she had begun. Simmons looked down at the dead woman at his feet, completely out of breath. The pounding at the door continued, as Wicks screamed for him to open it. He knew the fight was coming but he waited, taking his time to get dressed and avoid the puddle of blood on the floor. He didn't mean to kill her. He hadn't meant to kill any of them but it always happened so he wasn't surprised. He finished dressing and drew his gun. He opened the door without so much as a hint of sorrow for his actions and pointed the gun in Wicks face. Wicks immediately put his hands in the air to ward off getting shot and gasped when he saw the young girl on the floor. "You killed her," Wicks said in horror. It wasn't that one of his girls hadn't been killed before but the brutality that lay in waste on the floor was enough to make anyone sick at their stomach. "You're one crazy bastard," Wicks said it before he could stop himself and watched as Simmons' hold tightened on the trigger. "Don't tell anyone about this," Simmons growled. "You can take care of the mess yourself." "Alright." Wicks nodded slowly hoping he was going to live to take care of the task. "There's going to be a territorial marshal asking questions. You're going to throw him off our trail. We're headed to Rose Stones Crossing," Simmons continued as he watched the frenzied nods of agreement, "Good, we'll be going now." He holstered his gun and walked out of the room past Wicks. Jimmy and Lou lay entangled in each other, both looking up at the sky. Clothes lay scattered around them, discarded without care. Lou rested her head against Jimmy's chest with a contented sigh. One of his hands rested over hers against his chest. The other stroked her hair tenderly. "I think I could stay like this forever." Jimmy smiled as he watched the stars shine over them. Jimmy felt peace and happiness untainted by the past and he relished its warmth. He locked this moment away within his memory. "I wish I didn't have to go in the morning." "Me too," Lou murmured against his skin. She stiffened when she heard a stick break under a heavy boot. Jimmy looked the ground over for his gun and cursed when he couldn't find it. He heard a familiar voice mutter something in the Kiowa tongue and saw Buck whirl around, turning his back to them. Jimmy knew he had gotten an eyeful. "What are you doing out here, Buck?" Jimmy handed Lou her shift off the ground as they scrambled for the rest of their clothes. "I'd ask you the same thing, but I have a pretty good idea," Buck replied the hint of a smile in his voice. "Rachel got worried about Lou. She sent me to check." "Well you can tell her Lou's fine," Jimmy replied as Lou covered her mouth trying not to laugh. She knew she should be embarrassed but she was so happy from being with Jimmy and getting her memory back that the whole thing seemed simple in comparison. "I'll do that. You two take care. It's getting chilly out." Buck chuckled softly. "Buck," Jimmy warned as he pulled his pants on. He exchanged a smile with Lou who was hurriedly getting her skirt on. "Jimmy," Buck replied evenly, stifling the fit of laughter that was threatening to overcome him. He started heading back toward the station. "I'll see you in the morning, Lou. Jimmy, I reckon I'll see you when you get back from your ride." "I need to talk to your boss," Sam Cain cleared his throat as the scantily clad woman looked up at him like he had lost his mind. "Everyone wants to talk to the boss," he heard her mutter to herself as she walked away angrily. "Wicks!" A few moments later a man, who Sam assumed was Wicks, walked up to him looking too pale and shaken for Sam's liking. "How can I help you?" Wicks asked, finding it difficult to use his voice. "There was a group of men stopped by this way," Sam began but stopped himself as he looked Wicks over in dismay. The man clearly looked under the weather. "Are you okay?" "I'm fine," Wicks nodded. Sam thought that was possibly the farthest from the truth that it could be. "Look, a group of men led by a man named Joseph Simmons came through here. We have witnesses that say they spent the night here," Sam leveled with him. "They did." Wicks nodded again. "All of your girls alright?" Sam sighed inwardly expecting to hear the worst, that one of Wick's girl's was dead. He saw the hint of fear cross Wicks features. What he saw there was enough to send shivers racing down his spine. He knew that a man who ran a business like this usually had a less then reputable character but Wicks was worse than that. Sam could tell by the coldness of his demeanor, the way that the girls eyed him as they passed. "They are all fine." Wick's voice was steady and cool. Sam felt his heart sinking. Wicks was lying. And what worried Sam was that someone like Wicks was scared as hell and he knew it wasn't his badge that had him this shaken. "Are you sure about that...because I have a trail of dead women from one end of the territory to the other. Now I know Simmons is responsible. We have a slue of witnesses. If you're covering for him..." "Look Marshal. I hope you catch him. I really do..." "I am going to catch him," Sam replied, matter-of-factly. "The man's a monster." Wick's seemed to be sizing up the situation, deciding whose team he needed to be on. "He knows you're after him. Told me to throw you off, send you to Rose Stones Crossing. I don't think that would be the right thing to do though...They headed for Rock Creek...hard and fast." "Rock Creek?" Sam felt his heart began to race. "The girls hear things." Wick's elaborated. "Thank you." Sam turned toward the door and paused, asking, "How many men did he have?" Sam had a rough figure but he wanted a better estimate. "Twenty, give or take a few, maybe twenty-five." Wicks replied. " Only half of them stayed the night here. The girls..." "Hear things...I know. Thanks." Sam just nodded and continued on his way. He had to get a warning to Teaspoon somehow. Carlington, Nebraska Territory
Jimmy sat down, putting his hat on the table in front of him. He was exhausted. It had been a long hard ride that had not been helped by his lack of sleep. He was glad Lou had her memory back, so glad that he wished he was there with her now. The night they had spent together was just another reason spurring him home. He wished the night would pass quickly and he could be back at the station by the time she got up in the morning but he knew it was impossible. It would be the middle of the afternoon before he reached Rock Creek. He smiled at the waitress, made with the pleasantries and ordered his food. He was halfway through the meal thinking about how he wanted to propose to Lou at the upcoming dance, well not actually at the dance. What he had planned was for after the dance. He had already asked Rachel to help him pick out a ring. She had agreed but they had not had a chance yet. He was thinking about all the details when he heard the men entering loudly. "Rest up boys, this is the last stop before we get there," a man called out as a flood of men walked into the hotel. Jimmy watched them file in one by one and was almost tired of watching them despite the nervousness the whole thing caused him when he noticed the last man to walk in. The scar was unmistakable and hideous. He found himself both loathing and sickened at the sight of them all and complimenting Lou on her handy work at the same time. He sat there never one to weigh all the options. He usually reacted before reason had a chance to take hold. The first thought that popped into his head though as he put his hand to his gun at his right side was about Lou and how she was waiting for him back at the station with their baby growing inside her. He eased his hand off his gun knowing that even if he took Simmons out he would be dead by the time it was all over. Instead he sat there biding his time, eating his meal and just watching. It was the hardest thing he had ever done in his entire life. Harder then seeing Lou in Blue Creek, harder then facing her after leaving her because of his own pride, harder even then holding her as she cried about what all these people had done to her. It was starring into the face of the devil with no recourse. He sat there and watched until he knew exactly how many men there were and every single one of their faces. Finally he excused himself having taken all that he could and made his way to his room. He would wait until they settled and ride out. "We have a problem." Simmons sat down next to Lenny out on the porch. He loved the fresh night air. "You mean 'sides the marshal that's tracking us?" Lenny sneered at him. He was the only one of the men that could get away with talking to Simmons that way. Simmons acknowledged the comment with a nod. "What's wrong?" "A Pony Express rider from Rock Creek is here," Simmons replied evenly. "You want me to take care of him?" Lenny smiled. He wasn't opposed to killing no matter what the reasoning was behind it. That's why Simmons liked him so much. "I have a better idea." Simmons heard the clink of the chains as he maneuvered the shackles out of his pack and tossed them to Lenny. "We're taking him with us." Jimmy sat in the chair by the window in his room his gun in his hands, his breathing slow and even as he watched the door and looked out the window every now and then to check on the positions of the gang. He was hoping that they would turn in before too late so he could make his way out of town without too many eyes on him. He jumped when there was a knock at the door and slowly rose to his feet. "Just a minute," he said quietly and cocked the gun feeling his heart pounding in his chest. He walked to the side of the door and inched it open. He was about to slam it shut as he realized that Simmons man Lenny was outside in the hallway. Lenny shoved his shoulder into the door and the force of the impact caused Jimmy to be knocked back, unable to get his gun up before Lenny and another man had their own guns drawn on him. "Drop it," Lenny said, licking his lips as a crazed smile crossed his face. Jimmy felt his hand release the weapon and heard it thud against the floor as just how wrong things had gone began to register in his brain. The Next Day "If we change horses in Carlington and ride through we'll catch them just inside Rock Creek." Sam didn't like the plan any more then the men riding with him. He didn't like the idea of coming into the middle of only God knew what with a group of fatigued men, especially if they rode straight into a fight. "It's the only way I know of." "We can make the change over," Seth Stone agreed, nodding. "Some of the men can go gather up some food in the mean time." They were coming up on Carlington and Sam could see smoke coming from one of the buildings. "Looks like they made their mark," Seth commented with a shake of his head as he looked out over the small outpost. "Lets go see what they did." Sam felt like he was chasing some legend. A ghost in the night that was always one step ahead of him. He wasn't about to give up though. This Simmons and his men had to be stopped. They had to account for the atrocities they had committed. Sam and his men rode through the main street seeing that it was a small store building smoldering, the fire long ago extinguished. The sheriff walked out to meet them. "Sheriff." Sam gave him a nod of recognition. "Marshal," the sheriff replied with the same nod. "You after the men that did this?" "If it was the Simmons gang then yes sir. What happened? Anyone hurt?" Sam replied. He didn't want to think about the possibilities. "Few boys scuffed up but everyone made it through the night. We had one abduction though." "Barmaid or working girl?" Sam had seen Simmons handy work all through the Territory it was a safe bet that he had kidnapped a woman. "No a Pony Express rider. He's stationed at Rock..." "Creek?" Sam looked around the small town and tried to image the reasons for Simmons to have taken one of the boys. Maybe he got in their way. They had a way of trying to defend people. Could have been anything but somehow Sam didn't think it was quite so simple as one of the boys just getting in their way. "Seth, you think you can skirt 'em and try and ride into Rock Creek ahead of them," Sam asked as he dismounted and began his way toward the stables. "I can try." Seth eyes widened as he tried to think of how in the world he was going to be able to get ahead of them. He'd need more then one horse that was for sure. "Good, I want you to get a message to Teaspoon Hunter." Jimmy awoke startled and looked down at his chained hands, realizing that his nightmare was real. He noticed immediately that Simmons was standing over him. "What's your name boy?" Simmons asked him as he sat down on the ground near him. Jimmy had already thought about what to tell him. He didn't want the group to know that he was 'Wild Bill Hickok.' The chances of him surviving to get out of this in Rock Creek dropped by a lot if they knew that. "I was under the impression that Mr. James Butler Hickok was scheduled for the run." Simmon's paused over the name with a bit of doubt as if to show that to mention it did nothing to stir up fear. He had definitely done his homework. "He was scheduled for a last minute job right before I rode out," Jimmy answered. "I'm Kid." "That what your parents called you?" There was another smirk and a laugh out of the men. "Yeah. It's a long story," Jimmy replied wishing he had a gun at the moment. "I'll bet. Pity I was hoping to meet this 'Wild Bill' fellow." Simmons truly looked disappointed. "Oh I'm sure you'll meet him in Rock Creek," Jimmy replied with a note of sinister warning. Two Days Later Lou walked out the door to the main house clad in some work pants and a shirt and she was pulling on her gloves as she went. Cody and Ike stopped their pace across the yard with the boxes of canned food that they were carrying back into the storm cellar. Lou walked around them without saying a word and picked up one of the smaller boxes before beginning her descent into the cellar. She stopped on the top step and turned back to the gawking group. She had yet to inform them of her memory being intact since she had spent every last moment the last few days with Jimmy and Rachel. The others just hadn't been around her enough to realize it and she didn't want to big of a deal made out of it. She had already been the center of attention around the station so much the last few weeks that getting back to some normality seemed the right course of action. Besides, she was happy enough for all of them. "Be careful with those boxes," Buck called from the bunkhouse porch. He didn't want to be overprotective but he still had the vivid recollection of how much she had needed everyone else around here the last few weeks. Whether she liked it or not, she still had to take it easy. "Buck," Lou replied softly, the hint of defensiveness very apparent in her voice. She hoped that the simple chores would help her feel better. "Lou," Buck countered, knowing how sore she might get at him but not caring for the moment. "Jimmy'll have my hide if you aren't alright when he gets back." "I'm fine," Lou replied, looking up at him as the rest of the group stood still watching the exchange. "I'm pregnant not on my death bed." "Yeah but it wasn't that long ago that I recall you being pretty close." Alex stepped onto the porch behind Buck who was pulling his coat on. He looked a little worse for the wear but seemed to be doing okay. "I don't need your help here." Buck turned to Alex. Buck and Alex exchanged a strained glance. Though Alex thought he had a handle on Lou, everything the man knew about her had changed, in the blink of an eye, the moment Lou's memory returned. The confused and tearful woman that Alex wanted to protect may still have been in front of them but she was not so confused and she wasn't about to let anyone see her shed another tear if she could help it. The Lou that was walking down into the cellar could eat Alex alive if he made her feel weak. Buck understood that Lou was covering over her pain and the struggle of emotional upheaval by trying to slide back into her old life. What she needed was to feel capable of doing the things that she had been able to do before her life got so altered. Buck knew she wouldn't be able to draw the line though. That thin line that separated what she was capable of and what she thought she was capable of. She could be so stubborn. Everyone in the yard, except Alex, seemed to know about the impending fight. "I'm better now," Lou's voice called from the cellar. Cody and Ike started moving again clearly wanting to get the boxes into the cellar and clear out before things escalated. Lou put her box on the shelf and turned to go and get another. "Lou, just get the smaller ones...makes me feel better," Cody stated as she began climbing the steps. "Cody, I'm fine. It's about time I got back to work around here." Lou realized, as she said the words, one of the reasons her anger was getting the better of her. No matter how many chores she did around the yard and the house, she wasn't going to be getting back to work, not really. She wasn't going to ride again. She hadn't even been able to enjoy her last ride. Lou put her hand out to steady herself as she stepped out of the cellar, reprimanding herself for thinking about the attack. She swallowed the hard lump and cleared her throat; biting back the tears that she refused to let anyone else see her cry. She had cried enough for the last few weeks. Lou walked across the yard and grabbed another box then turned right around and started back towards the cellar. "Lou, you're supposed to be taking it easy," Buck called from the porch as he pulled his gloves on to help move the boxes. It was easier than fighting. If she didn't have boxes to move then she had to slow up. "I'm sure Rachel's got some stuff around the house you could help with if you're just itching to do chores," Alex piped in thinking that he was helping. Buck closed his eyes when he heard the comment. Alex looked from Buck's closed eyes to Cody's gaping mouth, to Ike's head shaking, and finally to Lou's angry glare. He felt like everyone knew something he didn't. His suggestion sounded like a reasonable idea to him. "Cody, don't let her get the big ones," Buck whispered as soon as Lou was out of earshot then he turned to face Alex. He had to shut the man up before he made things worse. "Can I talk to you for a minute?" "So long as the talking's with words." Alex nodded. Buck led him into the bunkhouse. "You really need to stay out of this. She has her memory back now." Buck started seeing the confusion surface in Alex's features. "What does that have to do with anything?" Alex didn't understand how getting her memory back could change her that much. "Alex, we were never completely honest with you. Lou, isn't who you think she is. She never just worked around here. Up until the attack she rode for the Pony Express. She disguised herself as a man and took just as many and as dangerous rides as the rest of us." Buck let the first part sink in for Alex. He could tell things were starting to fall into place for the deputy now. "She slept in the bunkhouse, did the same chores as the rest of us, she didn't get special treatment. She earned her keep." "No wonder..." Alex trailed off remembering the look on everyone's face when he had railed into them about letting her go alone. She had probably taken worse rides by herself. "With her memory back she isn't going to ask for help, she isn't going to break down, she isn't going to ask anyone for anything. Even if she needs it," Buck continued. "She is not the same woman you met in Blue Creek." Teaspoon walked out onto the porch to meet the rider that was coming in hard. He dismounted and nearly fell from sheer exhaustion but straightened himself quickly trying to slow his breathing so he could get out what he needed to say. "I need to talk to Marshal Hunter," he finally got out. Teaspoon looked the deputy over with a frown. "That's me." He pulled his coat to the side to reveal his badge. The man's eyes widened in surprise but he took a deep breath, readying himself to tell his tale. "We don't have much time. I was able to skirt around them. But I only came in a few minutes ahead of them." "Who?" Teaspoon didn't like the sound of all of this so far. "Simmons and his men. Territorial Marshal Sam Cain sent me to warn you. I'm Seth Stone by the way. Simmons and his men have been making their mark all over the territory. They took an Express rider in Carlington and then headed this way. Like I said I got ahead of them but they aren't far behind." "An Express rider?" Teaspoon closed his eyes and shook his head as he grabbed his hat out of his office and headed for his horse. "Uh...yeah. Don't know who just that he was from Rock Creek," Seth replied as he got back to his horse. "Is he..." "He's alive so far as we know." Seth mounted back up seeing the cloud of dust in the distance. "They'll be here soon. I hope Sam isn't too far behind." "How many?" Teaspoon got on his horse and started in the direction of the station with the young deputy along side him. "Twenty or so." "Dear Lord." Teaspoon shook his head again. It wasn't much of a warning but he would take what he could get. "How many men does Sam have?" "Ten," Seth replied. "But I don't know how far behind they are. He told me to break off in Carlington to get here." "Ya," Teaspoon spurred the horse to a hard pace to get to the station ahead of the cloud that was coming in fast at their backs. Seth matched his pace. Lou paused with the box in her hands. She thought she had probably over done it but she finished placing it on the shelf before she turned, nearly bumping into Ike. *You okay?* he asked cautiously. "Yeah," she whispered, feeling an ache in her side. Maybe she had jumped the gun on the whole getting back into the swing of things. "Think I need to take a break." She smiled weakly at him. *Alright.* Ike nodded, watching as she hurried up the steps and out of the cellar. He would have helped her but he knew she wasn't going to let him. He placed his box and hurried up after her stopping her so he could talk to her. *It's good to have you back in one piece.* He knew she had her memory back; he had overheard her talking about it with Jimmy. He didn't know why she hadn't told everyone yet but he didn't care at the moment. He was just glad to see his old friend looking back at him. "Thank you." She smiled as Cody, who was waiting for her to move out of the way, realized what they were saying. He set his box down with a beaming smile. "You got your memory back?" Cody as much stated it as ask it. When she nodded he scooped her up and whirled around with her in his arms. "Congratulations," He said with an exuberant hug. "Thanks Cody." She laughed as he set her back on her feet. No sooner was she out of Cody's warm hug then Ike joined in with a soft hug of his own. Ike smiled brightly pulling out of the hug at last. "I'm glad to be back," Lou said to Ike with a nod after hugging him back. "Thanks guys." She was more then a little happy to have the small reunion rather then a big to do about it. "I need to take a break. I'm going to go sit down for a minute." She knew they had to get finished up and there were only a few boxes left. "You okay?" Cody asked in concern. Lou wondered how long they were going to keep asking her that every time she looked the least bit unsettled. "Fine." She nodded biting her tongue. She smiled at the two of them then started for the main house. She got inside and looked at Rachel who smiled back at her. "They all figure out you're back?" Rachel asked quietly, seeing that Lou was already worn out from the small task she had chosen to undertake. "Yeah." Lou nodded. "I think I'm going to go lie down for a minute." "Take your time. You've been through a lot Lou. You didn't think it was going to be so easy to just step back into the swing of things did you?" "Not really," Lou replied, knowing that deep down she had hoped for more but that she couldn't expect her body to just comply because she hoped. "Will you come get me for lunch?" "Sure," Rachel nodded. Lou walked into the bedroom and sank to the bed tiredly. Cody and Ike walked into the main house after finishing with the boxes. "So you see I'm right." Cody had been saying much to Ike's protests. Rachel turned on them in amusement. "Right or wrong you boys need to wash up. Lunch is almost ready." Rachel got out before they could continue their discussion. They turned back around and headed out to wash up with grumbles all around. Buck and Alex followed soon after and all of them sat down at the table while Rachel went to fetch Lou. Lou was back at the table by the time Kid rode in, got Katy situated and joined them at the table. Buck was stirring a hole in his mashed potatoes when he heard the horses riding into the yard. His first thought was that it was Jimmy but it sounded like more than one horse and Jimmy wasn't due in for a few more hours. He got to his feet and went to the window. Buck had an intuitive bad feeling that seemed to radiate from his sinking stomach. Looking out the window, he saw Teaspoon and another man dismounted in the yard in front of the main house and hurried up the steps, onto the porch. They were both winded and shaken. Buck swallowed the lump forming in his throat as Teaspoon drew his gun and checked it before he even walked through the front door. 'What could be wrong now,' he thought, dreading the answer to that question. Teaspoon and his companion stepped through the door. Buck instantly noticed the badge on the other man's chest. Teaspoon cleared his throat effectively getting everyone's undivided attention. "Boys you know the drill. We'll skip the formalities. You're all deputized. This here is Seth Stone, one of Sam's deputies." Teaspoon rolled the cylinder of his gun into place with a resounding click that was heard by the entire stunned, silent group. "Simmons and his men are minutes away. Sam has a posse and is coming in behind them but I don't know how far behind." Teaspoon took a breath, looking over the serious faces around him. Jimmy was the only one missing. He felt his anger swelling as he watched Lou's reaction. She looked absolutely terrified. He didn't want to go on. He knew how upsetting the rest of his disturbing news was going to be for everyone. "Something else you should know..." Teaspoon licked at his wind-burned lips wishing like the dickens that what he was about to say was not true. That either the information was wrong or Jimmy had escaped. "We think that Simmons may have Jimmy." Lou felt like the world was sinking around her. Just when she thought that it couldn't get worse it did. It was as if every nightmare she had ever dreamed had swirled into one tangled mass and crashed into the waking world shattering hers in the process. Still she fought the fear and the dread trying to maintain her composure, to stand on her own two feet and face the monsters that would soon come calling with Jimmy as leverage. Buck couldn't find his voice at first. He watched Lou struggling under the news as he met Teaspoon's gaze and saw the fear resting in his adoptive father's eyes. Whatever scared Teaspoon certainly merited the absolute terror that now swam through Buck's veins. Cody drew his gun as the news settled over him. "How many men?" he asked, knowing there had to be a good number to have Teaspoon spooked. He didn't even want to add Jimmy into the equation yet. "Twenty or more," Teaspoon replied quietly, hearing the shocked gasp from Rachel. "That all." Cody frowned trying to ease the tension in the face of the incredible odds with a bit of sarcasm. Ike looked out the window. He thought about how easy it would have been for Cody or him to have taken Simmons out in St. Jo if they had only known. He wasn't sure he could have really justified it at the time, knowing that, regardless of what the man had done, it would have been a cold blooded kill. Knowing what he did now and how grim the outcome looked for all of them, especially Jimmy, it was easy to justify an action he hadn't taken no matter how much he now wished he had. "Rachel, get the shot gun. You and Lou get in the bedroom." Teaspoon began as Lou came out of the spell in favor of sheer need. She drew her gun and weighed it in her unsteady hand. It had been a long time but it still felt right the way it rested in her palm. "I'm not hiding. You know you need another gun," Lou replied softly trying to sound as convincing to herself as she hopefully sounded to everyone else. "She's right," Cody said, looking from Lou to the window that he now moved toward to get into a good position. This was as much her fight as anyone else's. More it seemed, considering what had been done to her and the hostage that Simmons had. Cody paused at the window seeing the cloud of dust that was moving into the yard. "I hope we have enough shot." Teaspoon watched the cloud as it obscured his view of the bunkhouse. Seth paled as the horses came thundering into the yard. Kid had his gun in hand as he moved to the window. "Guess it's about time they showed up." Alex checked his weapon. Alex shook his head in frustration as he moved to the other side of the window that Kid now occupied. Buck got to the other window and took a position opposite Teaspoon as the entire group watched in a fearful silence as the dust settled. Kid pressed his right cheek against the windowsill he was leaning heavily on, as he looked out into the yard at the sea of horses and dismounting men. He couldn't even see the bunkhouse. He heard his own breathing as his heart quickened, preparing him for the fight to come, and saw all the men moving among the horses - all but Jimmy. "I believe I have something you want, Louise." Simmons's voice caused all of them to jump. "I don't see him," Kid and Alex whispered harshly in unison. "He's on the other side of the horses. I think he's using them as cover," Buck replied quietly, he couldn't see him either but he knew where the voice had come from. "I could be mistaken, but I guess we can find out together," Simmons continued. "Here's how it lays out. You come out and I spare your buddy here. I'll even let him go." "He's going to kill Jimmy," Buck gasped wishing he could actually see the exchange so he could get a shot on Simmons before any damage was done. "He'll kill them both if she comes outside," Alex said quietly back. 'No, no, no.' Kid steadied himself against the sill wishing he could will the horses to move so he could take Simmons out and end this. He felt trapped. Lou was going to try and save Jimmy and all Kid could do was think of a way to help her save herself. Dammit, why couldn't he get the shot? He frantically shoved himself off the windowsill, checking all the possible angles from his window and then the one Buck stood behind. "I can't get the shot," Kid's voice cracked under the strain as he finally settled back in his original position and met Buck's gaze. Only the large front door separated the two of them. Kid looked past Buck and teaspoon to the second window along the front side of the house. It was separated from the rest of the room by a large door frame, but Kid could still see Seth and Ike taking up positions. He then turned to the bedroom that lie to his other side and Saw that Lou and Cody were inching the curtains back to see more clearly. Jimmy looked up from his position on his hands and knees on the ground in front of Simmons. He could see all the eyes on him from the corners of the windows in the main house. The horses danced about nervously in front of them knowing that a fight was coming. He had resolved himself to die like this. Because he would be damned if Lou was going to get herself killed saving him. It was his own fault. He should have left Carlington when he had the chance. "Don't do it, Lou!" He only prayed that she listened and stayed put. He heard Simmons cock the gun behind him. He wished he could see the man at his back to know what he should expect. The gunshot sounded in his ears a split second before he felt the bullet enter his left calf. Jimmy screamed. "Or I see how many shots it take to kill him," Simmons called out and cocked the gun again. Lou felt her breath catch in her throat as she listened to Simmons and watched Jimmy kneeling before him. She had seen him cock the gun and watched as he pointed it steady. She couldn't get a clear enough shot on him though. With no more feeling than someone stepping on an insect, he shot Jimmy in the leg after Jimmy shouted for her not to come out. Lou pushed off the window and started for the door. She couldn't let Simmons kill Jimmy. She nearly ran into Kid who jumped in her way. "Move Kid." Lou stopped and met his eyes evenly. He wasn't about to move, she could tell. Instead of listening to all the reasons he wasn't about to let her walk out the door, she punched him in the gut and watched him double over. "Sorry," she whispered and sidestepped him to get to the door. Ike met her there, having witnessed her move for the door from the other room. She could also now see Teaspoon splitting his attention from the scene in the yard to the one unfolding inside. *You can't do this!* Ike was as frantic as she felt on the inside. Her need though was to get outside not to stay in here as he wanted. "Jimmy would do the same thing for me, and you know it." Lou reached for the latch that Ike's hand was resting over. *He'll kill you both,* Ike said, moving his hand off the latch to sign it. Lou grabbed the latch quickly. "Thought maybe he meant more to you than that," Simmons called out and another shot rang out. Jimmy screamed again. Lou unbolted the door hurriedly and flung it open. "You can stop now," Lou called out as she stepped onto the porch. Jimmy looked up at her with pained tears in his eyes. He shook his head in horror. He wanted to scream at her to go back in the house but he couldn't force any words out. His left leg and arm felt like they were on fire and pain was running through him in waves making him sick at his stomach and lightheaded. Why did she have to come out here? "Well, well." Simmons smiled and cocked his gun again. "Drop your gun and kick it to the side. Then come down here." "You promised to let him go," Lou replied as she did as he asked. She caught Jimmy's agonized eyes as he held his head up in defiance of his condition. "And I will." Simmons nodded as she descended the steps slowly. Lou couldn't believe she was doing this. She was giving herself up to these mad men. She stopped just in front of Simmons right next to Jimmy and slowly knelt down to see how he was. "You okay?" She knew he wasn't. What she wanted to know was if he was going to make it. "Yeah," Jimmy said through clenched teeth, as Simmons crouched down with them. "One more thing before you go," Simmons said to Jimmy. Jimmy felt like someone had knifed him in the gut then twisted the blade sharply making it hard to breath. Lou was in the yard with the bastard who had just shot him twice and had not so long ago beaten her until she hadn't remembered anything. He couldn't move, though he wanted to do everything in his power to get her away from Simmons. "The horses are really uneasy. Any more shots and they'll run," Buck noted trying to find a way to tip the scales. "Yeah and then Lou and Jimmy get caught in the cross fire," Kid retorted clearly at his wits end. "Or trampled." The silence that hung in the air after that was thick and unsettling as they all watched and waited for any opportunity to do something that didn't involve killing Lou and Jimmy. Lou felt a presence behind her and then felt Lenny's hands grab hold of her arms. "What are you.." She trailed off when she saw the knife in Simmons hand. He held it so close to Jimmy's face and then looked back at her with his wicked smile. "I have to exact some sort of retribution for your act of savagery," Simmons explained and reached for Jimmy's face. Lou gasped realizing what was about to happen when all at once Jimmy reacted faster then she would have ever thought, especially in his condition. He centered his weight on his wounded shoulder and grabbed Simmons wrist yanking him forward hard. The man fell to his knees, in shock as Jimmy brought their faces closer together. "I told you, you would meet Hickok in Rock Creek," Jimmy growled. He twisted Simmons' wrist and angled the knife at his boot and shoved the whole end of it through Simmons' boot and into his foot. "Can't say that it's been a pleasure." Lou watched taking the moment to gain the upper hand against Lenny. She elbowed him hard in the ribs with her right arm and simultaneously fit her small left hand over his on the gun in his left hand wrapping her finger around the trigger. She didn't have to out match him in strength for he was too shocked to react properly as he had been watching Jimmy and Simmons. She angled the gun at his calf and pulled the trigger. The gun then slipped from his grasp easily as he fell backwards with a scream. The horses bolted giving them about six seconds of cover as the rest of the men in the main house open fired on the men scattering around the yard. Simmons wrenched himself from Jimmy's grasp and, shoving Jimmy backwards, got to his feet screaming. He pulled the knife out of his foot and turned to the only direction gunfire was not coming from, the bunkhouse. Lou fired off two shots taking down the only two men in Simmons gang that had turned their guns in her and Jimmy's direction. The rest of the men had their attention on the gunfire coming from the main house. Alex watched the scene unfolding in the yard, the last pieces of the puzzle he had been working out in his head falling together in perfect clarity. He watched Lou with newfound respect having a hard time firing out the window from sheer shock. "Don't hit Lou or Jimmy!" Kid screamed, then cursed under his breath as a shot narrowly missed Lou hitting the dirt to her left. She didn't even flinch as her attention was torn between the retreating Simmons and Jimmy still on the ground. Jimmy pushed himself back up and got to his feet the heavy chain causing him to stumble over his shackled feet as he turned on one of the men focusing on shooting up the main house. He used the manacle around his wrist to hit the guy in the jaw and watched the shocked man stumble to his knees. Jimmy reached down and pulled the gun from his hand, turning in the direction of Simmons, meeting Lou's gaze briefly. Silent understanding passed between the two of them. They had to do or die. Lou turned away from him and headed for the bunkhouse trying to catch up with Simmons who had already disappeared through the door. Jimmy headed in that direction moving slow on wounded limbs that were weighed down by the chains. "I'm out!" Buck yelled in frustration tossing his gun to the side as he drew his knife. No sooner did he have it in his hands then he saw a man train his gun at Jimmy's back. Buck threw the knife and caught the man in the back before he could fire as Teaspoon tossed him another loaded gun. Seth Stone watched the reactions of the group in wonder. They operated with silent understanding of each other's capabilities as if they were use to this sort of thing. Gunfire erupted from somewhere outside and Teaspoon, without taking his eyes or gun off the action in the yard, announced, with a hint of amusement in his voice, "Sam finally decided to join this shindig." Lou walked through the door of the bunkhouse and scanned the area immediately aware that Simmons was nowhere in sight. She no sooner cleared the door then it was slammed, full force, into her back sending her to the floor. She hit the floor with the palm of her hand and pushed hard, rolling onto her back, trying to level the gun at Simmons, when Jimmy came barreling into the house. Jimmy was moving so fast that his injuries seemed to have taken a back seat to the actions he was asking of himself. It didn't hold out though. He felt his legs beginning to buckle as he came through the door and his entire left side erupted in pain. He used the momentum to his advantage though as he came in right behind Simmons and pulled his hands apart leveling the short length of chain between his hands at the back of Simmons knees on his way down. He hit him hard taking him all the way to the floor with him. Simmons landed on his stomach and yelped as the air was knocked from his lungs. Simmons, no longer concerned with Lou, took the knife in his hands and tried to turn under the weight of Jimmy's body. Lou didn't give him the chance. She fired one shot after another directly into his skull, even after he slumped forward under Jimmy. Jimmy stayed perfectly still, waiting for Lou to quit firing, before he moved. When she did, he saw that she still held the gun on the dead man as tears streamed down her face. Her breathing was labored because she fought the urge to breakdown completely. He hadn't really counted all the shots but he thought there was one left in the gun. "Lou put it down," Jimmy said, trying to move as the pain that was snaking through his body from the multiple gun shot wounds finally registered in his brain. She looked up from Simmons to him and dropped her aim, and then the gun, to the floor. She nearly collapsed as Jimmy made his way to her. "You okay?" He asked as the barrage of gunfire in the yard finally died out. "He's dead," he replied when she didn't immediately answer. "It's all over." "I know," she said and suddenly felt the warm blood from Jimmy's shoulder as she reached for him. She sat up straighter and looked over the wounds, immediately going through the motions of trying to get the bleeding to stop. She was looking for something, anything to press against the wound as she looked him over in a frenzy. "You need the doctor." She was close to tears again moving on waves of her own hysteria. "Lou, I'll live." Jimmy smiled at her and grabbed a towel off the table near them. He pressed it to his shoulder and tried to get to his feet, realizing that he might need help to make it back out the door. He looked back at Simmons' body, knowing that the man had the keys to the shackles, and crawled in that direction, not willing to ask Lou to get them for him. He had them and the chains undone in the matter of a minute or so. He felt the pain coming on stronger. For some reason he hadn't felt as much pain a moment ago since he had been coming after Simmons. "I just need to know you and the baby are okay." "Fine. We're fine." She finally got out as she got to her feet and helped support him. They made their way to the window in time to see Sam and Teaspoon rounding up all the survivors. They slowly started out the door. Lou had never seen so much death in her entire life. It was utter hell on an endless repeat cycle. She thought she might get sick as soon as she stepped onto the porch. Even Jimmy, who had seen more than his fair share, tensed in her embrace. The tangled mass of bodies in the yard was mostly still, but some of the dying moved, trying to find a way to salvation. Lou concentrated on getting Jimmy to the main house and their friends that stood on the porch across the great expanse of the aftermath of the shoot out. Buck, Cody, and Ike came down into the fray to help Teaspoon and Sam as did both Alex and Seth and the many men Sam had brought with him. Kid, though, came in their direction. He stopped in front of them and all three of them just looked at each other a moment. The fact that the fight had come and gone and no one was now talking about it did nothing to ease the tension between the three of them. "You alright?" Kid asked Lou first. She nodded, repositioning Jimmy's arm around her shoulder to help support him better. Kid nodded and moved to get under Jimmy's other arm. "Lets get you in the house." "Thanks Kid." Jimmy was glad to quit leaning on Lou so much knowing that she was still supposed to be taking it easy. Of course he was sure that dodging bullets and killing a man didn't fall under the 'taking it easy' category either but she was doing okay so he didn't press it. "I'll run into town and get the doc once we've got you in the bed," Kid said quietly, noticing that Alex seemed to be watching them closely even as he waded through the bodies looking for the living. They noticed that Teaspoon was deep in conversation with Sam both of them no doubt trying to clear up the hole in each other's stories. "Thanks Kid," Lou said it this time. She didn't like the idea of having to be away from Jimmy's side and the fact that Kid seemed to be dealing with their relationship did wonders to calm her nerves. "It's no problem," Kid replied. He didn't know what else to say. Nothing was alright at the moment save that all of them were alive and the bad guy was dead and gone. Everyone seemed in a state of shock trying to pick up the pieces, which was something Kid had realized he might never do. He had picked up the pieces made them fit where they could and still the world seemed upside-down. The one thing he did know was that his two best friends deserved to be happy. He got Jimmy to Lou's bed and said his goodbye to go and get the doctor. Lou sat down beside Jimmy as Rachel came to the door. "Lets get that shirt off and have a look at your shoulder," She said quietly. "Lou, we need to rip his pants open there." She pointed at the wound in his calf. They both did as she asked as Rachel went to fill the water basin. Lou went to put pressure on Jimmy's shoulder still in a daze as Jimmy caught her hand in his. "Lou, I love you," Jimmy got out through grimaces of pain. "I love you too, Jimmy." She folded her hand around his and held it tightly. Despite everything, the battle, her memory, who they were, she knew that everything was going to be alright. No matter what the world threw at them they would make it and be better people for it. * I ran across this song (it was really scary, the similarities) that pretty much details the emotional hooha in this story just after finishing the last part here - so of course I had to add it. Think of it like the song that rolls over the credits.* You don't remember me but I remember you
I believe in you
Have you forgotten all I know
(Taking Over Me by Evanescence ) Email AmaraHOME |