There was something about this time of day that always made him think of her. She used to get up early and sneak out of bed before anyone else was up, just to watch the sun rise above the plains. She said there was something magic about the way the sky changed colors, that there was a peace that you didn't find at any other time of day. So many mornings they would find her sitting out on the steps of the bunkhouse, a look so full of peace and tranquility on her face, it made his heart ache to see her again in his mind's eye. What a fool he had been back then. He let his notions of what a woman was supposed to be like get in the way of who she really was. If only he hadn't pushed her into his best friends arms. There have been so many regrets over the years and now she was long gone from him. He'd never get to see her smile again, never see her eyes light with mischief when challenged over being a girl. He'd never hear her voice, just one more time. No more 'I love you', no more tears. Over the years, he had tried to get over her. Even thought about settling down a time or two, but his heart wasn't in it. How could it be when his heart was hers. Every now-and-then, he would go back to the old Express station and relive the days when it was home to the ragtag bunch of 'orphans' that quickly became a family. Last time he was there, the roof had fallen in and the barn had collapsed. On his last visit, he had spent hours talking to the man who was like a father to him, wishing to hear his voice give advice once more, but there was no familiar voice, only the wind whispering through the tall weeds that danced through the cemetery. When he left all those years ago, he couldn't bring himself to keep in touch. He knew that hearing about her with him would only break his heart. Thing is, it broke anyhow without her in his life. How many times he wished it had turned out different. He read in the paper that his friend had been shot in the back during a card game up in the Black Hills. Even then, he couldn't bring himself to go to her. Not too many months later he read that she had died, some said of a broken heart. He could understand that because she was always on his mind, even now. Her memory was with him all the time, her voice whispering in his ear each waking moment. Too late he realized that she was the only one meant for him. Closing his eyes, he whispered, "I will always love you Lou..." Email Lisa L. HOME